TOP 10: “Alien” Films Ranked
I came to the Alien franchise pretty late. I saw the first film probably in college or grad school (so more than a decade ago) and really enjoyed it. And with the release of Alien: Romulus, the mid-quel we didn’t know we wanted, I just knew that GPCD needed my definitive list of these critiques on capitalism (well, at least Alien is).
And if you want to yell at me over on Letterboxd, I’ve just started using it. So tell me how wrong I am!
Note that we call this a Top 10, but there’s only currently 8 Alien movies, 9 with Romulus, which we have yet to see.
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8. Aliens vs. Predator: Requiem (2007)
You know how on a particularly hot day, when you’re walking by a restaurant and you can smell their dumpsters and grease disposal, but also you’re blind and you can’t see what smells so bad? That’s this movie. It’s hot, poorly lit garbage.
7. Alien vs. Predator (2004)
It wanted to be The Thing but fell short a bit. It’s an obvious cash grab, and that’s fine. There are some good fight scenes, some characters to like, but it’s mostly an extra-terrestrial battle that’s pretty forgettable.
6. Alien: Resurrection (1997)
This is such a different movie tonally, and that makes sense, because Joss Whedon wrote it, and when you know that, it makes way more sense. Ripley of Nazareth is back (hence Resurrection) because we like clones, and Winona Ryder is our android this time around. Everyone is a cartoon character, especially the “child monster” and it’s face. It’s…not great.
5. Alien3 (1992)
Alien Cubed is a decent movie, but the off-screen deaths of Newt and Hicks are honestly unforgivable. Allegedly the writer for this installment was so annoyed by Newt that he decided to murder Newt offscreen. Rude, dude. The new characters aren’t as exciting or engaging as the predecessors, but we do get a shocking twist at the end with Ripley of Nazareth sacrificing herself for the greater good.
4. Alien: Covenant (2017)
Surprisingly philosophical and scary for that reason (and the Xenomorphs). The unsettled feeling you get at the end of this film is more of an existential dread than the creepy crawly heebie jeebies of the Ripley set. Androids are creepy as fuck. Ugh.
3. Prometheus (2012)
This is way better than I was expecting! I didn’t know that I wanted the origin of the facehuggers, but with the surgery scene, I’ll never forget it! It got a bit heady as we tried to figure out what Michael Fassbender wanted or why Guy Pierce never found a moisturizer he liked, but overall it was fantastic. Honestly, check this one out.
2. Alien (1979)
The original film is completely iconic. Between the badass final girl Ripley, learning what a chest burster is, and seeing our very first Xenomorph, Alien is a tense masterpiece that is so beautifully designed and acted, that of course it’s near the top of the list.
1. Aliens (1986)
Sometimes a sequel is utter garbage (see AvPR, Spider-Man 3, Look Who’s Talking Too) and sometimes a sequel is better than the original film (Spider-Man 2, The Godfather 2, Shrek 2) and that is the case with Aliens. They’re both absolutely stunning movies, but the world is built even stronger with this addition to the burgeoning franchise. The characters are interesting, the story is engaging, the scares are spine-tingling. It’s a close race, but ultimately, Aliens takes the cake.
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